A wise person is said to have four techniques, both inwardly and outwardly — Sama, Dana, Bheda and Danda. To deal with people in the world, to be wise in the world, the first technique is Sama, which means in a peaceful and understanding way. When that doesn’t work out, then you go to the second method called Dana, which means allowing it to happen, forgiving, and creating a space. When people don’t recognise your generosity in allowing them space, the third principle called Bheda comes. This means to create discrimination, make a difference, and intentionally create a gap. If somebody is at loggerheads with you, first you talk to them. When that doesn’t work, with the same love, you just ignore them. Allow them to realise it for themselves. Your generosity, your letting go, should make people realise their mistakes. If they don’t notice even then, you start using Bheda — create a difference. If two people are there, then you be partial to one person, because, by doing that, the other person will realise the mistake he has made. Now, even then, if they don’t realise their mistake, take a stick. This is Danda, the final approach.
The same four methods apply to your inner life, your being. However, in inner life, it is not one after another. Sama means maintaining equanimity. Whether pleasant or unpleasant sensations come, simply watch them with equanimity. Dana means giving up that which disturbs you, that which cannot put you in the royal seat of equanimity. It means to surrender the mind which is the cause of your sorrows, problems and misery. The mind says, “You did good things.” This pumps you up. It says, “Oh, you did bad things” and pushes you down. Negative actions give you suffering, but that suffering never stays all the time. Positive actions give you some pleasure. After some time, that vanishes. Any action, and its fruit, vanishes. It can never stay all the time. Dana (giving), includes forgiving also. When your mind wanders around, allow it to go. Don’t try to hold it back. Follow it and bring it back. Don't say “I am sick and tired of my mind. My mind makes me feel jealous and it is very bad!” Don’t start hating your mind. Forgive your mind. Say, “It is out of ignorance that my mind is getting into such stupid things.” Then you will not create a fight with your mind.
Now comes Bheda. Differentiate and separate the imperishable from the perishable. This very body is so hollow and empty. When you are watching the body, pleasant and unpleasant sensations arise. As you watch, they all disappear. Energy is oozing out of every pore of your body. If you watch, it flows in an even manner. It creates balance and you realise you are not this body or these sensations. You have been always reacting to the sensations. An emotion gives rise to some sensation. The sensation, in turn, creates an impression, another emotion. So these circles of craving and aversion with sensation and emotion, made your life, both the subtle body and the gross body, and that took you from life to life. Another thing that you can do is to disassociate yourself from the sensation. For example, when there is grief you say, “This is something that is changing. I shall not associate with it. I’ll watch the sensation instead.” It becomes very intense and disappears. It is the same with a pleasant sensation.
Then comes Danda. Danda means support. Determination and commitment are the Danda. Your spiritual discipline is Danda. The mind is like a vine (creeper). It needs support. Listening to spiritual discourses, satsangs, practice, Guru’s presence are all support, the Danda.
This very body is impermanent and, with the very attention given to it, you become a glow of consciousness. It is Chetna and Chitta, that is coming out of every pore of the body. The wick is the body and you are the glow. When you shift from the wick to the glow, your mind becomes stable.
