Agony Aunt: I have been promoted and I am my best friend’s boss

Agony Aunt: I have been promoted and I am my best friend’s boss

FPJ BureauUpdated: Wednesday, May 29, 2019, 12:47 AM IST
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‘Bossing’ own best friend

My best friend and I work at the same company. Initially we were really happy, used to have lunch together, cover up for each other’s mistakes but now, I have been promoted and I am her boss. I don’t wish to be rude or be bossy but at times if the work isn’t done I have to tell her strictly which upsets her. I don’t want to lose her as a friend but I can’t let her make mistakes and not do anything about it. She is angry with me and thinks that I have changed which is not the case. How should I make her understand that I am just doing my job and I really love her and that it has nothing to do with my position at work?

Ans: Being in the same place of work as your friend can be tricky, specially when (in your case) the two of you are at different levels of work. Maintaining a healthy professional as well as personal relationship becomes imperative as your roles are bound to clash if adequate measures aren’t taken. In case, despite talking to her, there is lack of understanding, you could brainstorm with your superior about resolving this issue.

Intern’s agony

I am doing an Internship in a renowned company. I am observing and getting a better understanding of how things work on ground. But I feel that since I am new to this, there are a lot of things I don’t know. I do make mistakes; don’t know what to say when, etc. while others are professionals. Because of this they get angry often which makes me feel imperfect, under confident and the workplace is getting negative for me. I want to work, be perfect but facing this environment everyday makes me quit. What should I do to make this internship a fruitful and learning experience?

Ans: The very idea of being perfect has its own share of imperfections. You are new to this particular job and it is highly possible that you may not understand or be able to deliver everything at work without errors; however, being observant and keen on learning new things could help you overcome the fear of not knowing everything and being imperfect. It is also very essential to focus on the praises that you receive on your work from your superiors in order to let it help you be more confident and become less apprehensive.

Patriarchy and pain

I am 43-years-old women. I manage my family business with my brother. I have put in my 100% to make this company number one. I am better than my brother; I know the company in and out and worked really hard for it. My dream was to be the CEO of the company but I never got considered because I am a woman. I love my company and I know I can run it better, but since I am not supported I feel dejected. All day I keep thinking about it, I have become aggressive. Is there any way to make him understand that I deserve it and do it in a peaceful manner?

Ans: I understand that not achieving your perceived goals because of patriarchal system could be quite frustrating. Since both you and your brother work equally, the decision of who can be a CEO depends on the company as a whole. Thus, discussing this matter with other board members and arranging for a fair chance at the CEO ship could be a possibility. Rather than resorting to aggressive measures an amicable discussion with the other senior executives can avert negative consequences.

Workplace woes

I am an employee with an MNC for the past 18 months and I am six months short of completing my two year bond with them. I have tried really hard in these past few months to neglect a lot of negative influence; however I feel that I can no longer stick to being indifferent. Various areas of my life are getting affected because of this. What is it that I can do to work on this issue?

Ans: Physical and mental health is always more important than putting yourself through unnecessary stress. Listing down pros and cons of quitting this job before the bond period ends and looking for a better work opportunity which suits your needs as well as merit. Since various areas of your life are getting affected acting on it immediately is essential in order to be able to get better control over this situation before it leads to any more impact on your life. Speaking to your immediate boss regarding possible options of quitting the term a little prior to its maturation could also be a beneficial thing.

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