Annoying roommate
I have recently moved to a new city, and after a lot of looking and waiting have finally found an apartment. However, I am unable to get along with my roommate as she is very untidy, loud and always has a lot of people over. I have confronted her about it and said she would changes things up but it has been 2 months and nothing has changed. I am not sure what to do anymore. Please give me some suggestions.
Ans: The question here arises is that how are her actions affecting you in the first place. If this is conveyed along with the confrontation things would be impactful. The ground rules need to be set between the two of you so that you both can live peacefully. Speak to your landlord as well to bring in some discipline if things get out of hand.
Problems of an introvert
My girlfriend has too many friends, and I am an introvert who values his privacy however she repeatedly pushes me to socialise and interact with a bunch of people dissimilar to me. While, I am happy to devote all my time to her, I am simply uninterested in hanging out with her friends, and I don’t know how to confront her about this because I love her and I don’t want to hurt her.
Ans: Your personality is something your partner needs to understand in order to share a close relationship with you as well as understand you. For her to understand, you will have to be forthcoming about you simply being an introvert and not being rude and obnoxious. You not telling her the reason as to why you dislike socialising might lead to various speculations which then may become hard to resolve.
The double-dating drama
I’m in a long-distance relationship and I have a very loving boyfriend, however he has very little time for me, and I have recently met a guy in my college who I get along with and I have been hanging out with him quite often, I think I have started liking him and I genuinely enjoy his attention and spending time with him. I also love my boyfriend very much, and cannot leave him and I don’t know what to do in this situation.
Ans: If the guy from your college is in way being an emotional anchor then your liking towards him may simply be a reflection of that connect. You mentioned loving your boyfriend and not wanting to leave him, thus if it that important for you then do tell him about how you miss the attention and long distance is being difficult for you. Also, have a conversation with the guy from your college and do tell him about your long-distance relationship, so that the closeness you both share remains within the lines of being friends unless both of you decide to blur it. Thus, ensuring both your relationships are viewed in the exact light as they should be.
The lost love
I was in a relationship for 9 years before I got married to the love of my life, however instantly things began to change and I have disintegrated to the point that we have lost touch with each other’s needs and wants. In this situation, I find myself drifting away from him. As I am still young and do not want to dedicate all my time to a negative person. How should I fix this?
Ans: Seeking some professional help in terms of marital counselling might help in putting certain things into perspective. The general myth of going to a counsellor is that one has to fix the marriage at any cost. If one is unhappy in the relationship and believes that it won’t work out, a counsellor can help get this perspective cleared as well. Have a conversation with your husband regarding the apparent gap between what you both expected and what the relationship has now turned out to be, where and how things can be altered and the need to seek help if things don’t work out between the two of you.
