We often talk about good karma and bad karma. But what is karma? How does it affect one’s life?
Ans: To put it simply, karma is the trigger behind our every desire, reaction and response. These triggers are stored in our body memory and define the neural pathways that create these desires, reactions and responses. Karma is neither good nor bad. It is our subconscious that defines them as good or bad. To understand how karma affects us, we can classify it into the following categories: Destiny Karma (our true desire in this birth), Ego Karma (blockers we create in this birth by judging ourselves, others and the world). We judge based on Relationship Karma (self-created ledger of perceived rights and wrongs in relationships across births) and Ancestral Karma (construct of values and beliefs built by society and upbringing across births). Once we become aware of these triggers, we can redefine our neural pathways by retraining our monkey mind. This enables us to follow our Destiny Karma and live a fulfilling life without suffering irrespective of the pain that life throws at us.
For the last few months, my relationship with my parents has become strained, more so with my father. We either end up arguing over small things or end up not talking at all. I have been consciously trying not to get agitated every time we talk, but it isn’t working. I don’t want my relationship to turn like his relationship with his parents. I don’t feel like going home but have no choice since I don’t have enough funds to get a place of my own. Please help.
Ans: The strain in any relationship comes from judging or feeling judged. Judging creates Ego Karma that leads to clashes. In your case, the judging is stemming from anger and guilt that the souls have accumulated across multiple births. This is what we call Relationship Karma. Due to this Relationship Karma, you are either judging your parents, especially your father, or feeling judged by them. As a result, no matter how much you are trying, you are getting agitated. You need to see a body memory therapist to find where this Relationship Karma with your parents is stored in your body. Coupled with Karma counselling sessions, you can create new neural pathways to control your reactions and responses. Once you can master your reactions and responses, you will be able to diffuse any stress in any relationship.
I have been feeling lonely and thoughts of going back to my ex have been plaguing my mind. We broke up almost seven years ago, but since we were friends before we became lovers, it was easy for us to go back to being friends. He is married. I don’t want to be a home-wrecker, but I feel frustrated that I don’t have him by my side anymore. Sometimes I wonder if this is the reason why I haven’t been able to move into a new relationship.
Ans: You have been in a seven-year relationship with your Ego Karma. Ego karma is what we keep creating in the present birth, every time we judge or feel judged. You have been judged by yourself that you aren't good enough for yourself and you need someone by your side. This judging has created a very strong Ego Karma causing suffering due to feelings of loneliness and frustration. Ego Karma makes us believe that being alone and being lonely is the same thing. So, it's high time you break up with your Ego Karma and form a self-loving relationship with yourself first. Once you will start overflowing with loving yourself, you will choose anyone from a place of want and not need.
(Kushagra Patwa is Founder & Karma Counselor @ Karma Is Not A Bitch; www.kinab.in)
