5 ways to deal with a narcissist in your life

5 ways to deal with a narcissist in your life

A narcissist is someone who has an exaggerated sense of who they are

Neha SinghUpdated: Saturday, June 03, 2023, 05:27 PM IST
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A narcissist is someone who has an exaggerated sense of who they are. A person with this trait frequently takes too much pride in their looks and persona, to the point that they show no care or empathy for others.

A narcissist is extremely self-centered, to the point where it negatively affects those around them. Dealing with a narcissist may be stressful and difficult. It can make it difficult to feel comfortable at home or at work, which is harmful to your mental health. Finding coping mechanisms is crucial. These few ways can help, whether you have to deal with a narcissist at home, at work, or in a social situation.

Understand the signs

"People with narcissism often have a grandiose and inflated sense of self. Their self-centered behaviors can often be hurtful, confusing, painful, and damaging to people or their relationships. Recognising and accepting signs of the following behaviours can help you with the most emotional pain — lack of empathy, being unapologetic, overreacting to criticism, being manipulative, and many more," says Bhakti Joshi, a counseling psychologist. If the person has all these signs, that means you are dealing with a narcissist. 

Don’t take it personally

People with narcissism are often a product of their environment — possibly genetics, childhood trauma, the environment, and life experiences. They might not recognise these symptoms, not realising they need professional help. You are aware that narcissistic actions like manipulation, and lack of regard aren’t actually personal attacks against you, but these behaviors often feel that way. Keep in mind that it is not personal. 

Establish boundaries

"Make sure you understand your own likes/dislikes of your own personal space, whether you are dealing with a narcissist at home or at work. Boundaries are something that is to be respected and non-negotiable," suggests Bhakti. 

Bhakti gives an example for better understanding. If they call out your name in a rude manner, make sure you let them know that you do not appreciate it. Give them a warning that if this does not stop, the conversation is over, and immediately walk away. Don’t argue or wait for their reactions/responses. Ensure that you practice these constantly so that the message is clear.

Support yourself

It is only natural that you will be drawn to an extrovert, charismatic, bold, and shining personality. But remember, all the glitter is not gold! If you have a low sense of self-worth, they are able to gauge your low self-confidence, your confusion, and your self-doubts, and they will use it for their personal leverage. Boost your self-esteem and make sure that it remains healthy. If you are not able to support yourself emotionally, then you should talk to close friends, family members, and good co-workers who can understand you. This is a way to get emotional support and the right perspective. 

Watch for gaslighting

When interacting with a narcissist, you may have noticed a behavior known as gaslighting. This kind of manipulation defies reality in a way that makes you question your own perceptions and experiences. They make you doubt your own opinions or experiences. They might constantly undermine your experiences by making fun of them and commenting on how you overreacted in the situation. Joking or making fun of situations that you are sensitive about. You can deal with them by keeping a written record, like a diary writing if you are dealing with a narcissist at work.

Signs of a narcissist

An arrogant sense of self-importance 

Obsession with fantasies of limitless success, power, beauty, and/or love 

Feeling special and unique 

Need excessive admiration 

Feeling entitled to take advantage of others 

Lack of empathy 

Demonstrating haughty or arrogant behavior on a frequent basis 

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