With time, the meaning and definition of dating has changed a lot. Some prefer old-school love, while others prefer casual dating. While dating, people look for their partners’ good and bad qualities, and then, after evaluating them, they decide whether they want the
relationship or not. What the better time than the Valentine’s week to understand what these dating flags mean and how people handle these flags...
Before dating, individuals meet a few times and have conversations to understand each other. Some individuals don’t look for flags immediately when they start seeing people. “Initially, I don’t look for any particular flags when I start a conversation or explore a bond. I try to make the person comfortable whenever they are with me. The vibe is more important. If I get positive vibes, then I can think about dating them. While dating, I will come to know about their red, pink, and green flags,” says advocate Gaurav Jain, 23.
These dating signs to some extent, they help individuals distinguish between good, bad, and everything in between. Harshil, 22, a stock market trader, mentions, “I do follow the flags to a certain extent, and by that I mean I try to figure out my red flags and try to turn them green. For example, if I’m talking to someone who is still close to their ex or has cheated before, I instantly spot the red flag and leave that situation.”
Everyone knows the term “red flag” in dating. It means danger signs that you can’t tolerate this signs. Various things are considered in a relationship, but disrespecting your partner is the biggest red flag. Chandni Shah, 21, highlights what she considers to be red flags. “A red flag is a negative aspect of a person, such as being emotionally unavailable, egoistic, lacking communication, or disrespectful. An emotionally unavailable guy is a big turn-off for me because, when we are in a relationship, we get attached to that person mentally, emotionally, and physically. If the guy is emotionally unavailable, then I avoid him completely.”
Recently, there are two new variants on the block — the pink and beige flag. Pink flags are the smallest flaws that cause us to take a step back and consider whether we should make room for both or not. It is often considered a gentle warning that something is amiss between you and your partner. Gen Z Kiran Manna, 23, reveals, “My dating partner used to make casual sexist comments sometimes, thinking that they were funny. I tried to let it go, but after some time, I confronted her about it, and she mentioned that she would try not to do it. But eventually, she did. So, I distanced myself from her, and now we’re not in touch anymore.”
The beige flag indicates that you find the other person boring. “I went on a date with a guy who couldn’t stop talking about the place where he lives, and he continued the entire conversation for three hours. I even tried to change the subject of the conversation, but the same topic kept coming up, so I went home and never spoke again. I found him boring because he was more interested in blabbering than getting to know me. What’s the point of going on a date if I find it boring?” Bhavika Sharma, 21, a social media executive, avers.
Green flags are the easiest to recognise. It demonstrates a person’s character, openness, values, and more. It allows you to feel more confident that you’re heading in the right direction and take steps to strengthen a budding relationship. Signs like caring gestures, being respectful, and accepting the person with their flaws, without asking them to change are a few of the green flag signals.
Many people take these flags seriously, while others do not. On this, Lourdinha D’souza, 22, states, “I wouldn’t say I follow them to the heart, but it’s a good way to have a heads-up for certain things that happen in a relationship. I believe that no matter what colour the flag is if there is a chance to make your relationship work and bring about a positive change, one should try. That being said, I strongly believe nothing is more valuable than your mental health and well-being.”
“A deal breaker is a deal breaker, regardless of whether the relationship is new, old, a situational relationship, or even a blossoming romance,” says Dr. Sagar Mundada, relationship expert. “It is important to be able to recognise these flags as soon as possible.”
“Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t make you feel happy,” Dr. Mundada advises.
Red Flag: Toxic traits of a person you can’t tolerate in relationship
Green Flag: Positive qualities of a person
Pink Flag: Personality traits that provide you with a gentle warning
Beige Flag: You find the person boring
