Learn How To Co-Habit Better With Your Partner

Learn How To Co-Habit Better With Your Partner

We often end up with someone who may have different circadian rhythm, priorities and motivations. But that necessarily shouldn't stop us from harmonious cohabitation

Somi DasUpdated: Saturday, February 10, 2024, 09:56 PM IST
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Living together under one roof with someone who possesses contrasting circadian rhythms, ideologies, routines, and motivations can present a unique set of challenges. However, with patience, understanding, and effective communication, it's entirely possible to foster a harmonious coexistence. Here are a few ways to live with someone who is a polar opposite in every sense to you.


Understanding circadian rhythms: Circadian rhythms dictate our sleep-wake cycles, influencing when we feel most alert and when we're inclined to rest. While some individuals are naturally early birds, others are night owls. Understanding each other's biological predispositions can lay the groundwork for better planning of one's schedule.


Respecting ideological differences: Ideologies shape our beliefs, values, and perspectives on life. It's common for individuals sharing a living space to hold differing ideologies, whether political, religious, or philosophical. The key lies in respecting each other's viewpoints, engaging in open-minded discussions, and finding common ground where possible.

Flexibility in routine: Routines provide structure and stability, but they can also create tension when they clash. Recognise that flexibility is essential when accommodating different routines. Compromise on shared responsibilities, such as household chores and meal times, can help create a balanced environment where both parties feel valued.

Motivations and goals: Each person brings their own aspirations and motivations to the table. While one may prioritise career advancement, the other might value personal growth or leisure pursuits. Acknowledge and support each other's goals, even if they diverge, and find ways to align interests to foster mutual encouragement and growth.

Effective communication: Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship. Be open and honest about your needs, preferences, and boundaries. Practice active listening and empathy to understand each other's perspectives without judgment. Establishing a safe space for dialogue can help address conflicts constructively and strengthen your bond.

Finding common ground: Despite differences, there are often areas of overlap where both parties can find common ground. Whether it's shared hobbies, mutual friends, or common goals, identifying these points of connection can foster camaraderie and enhance your shared experiences.

Compromise and collaboration: Living together requires a willingness to compromise and collaborate. Embrace the give-and-take dynamic of cohabitation, seeking solutions that accommodate both individuals' needs and preferences. Negotiate respectfully and be willing to adjust your expectations to find a middle ground that works for both parties.

Embracing diversity: Embrace the richness that diversity brings to your living arrangement. Recognise that differences in circadian rhythms, ideologies, routines, and motivations can offer new perspectives, broaden your horizons, and enrich your shared experiences.

Seeking professional support if needed: In some cases, navigating differences in circadian rhythms, ideologies, routines, and motivations may require professional guidance. Consider seeking the support of a couples' counsellor or therapist who can provide insights and strategies tailored to your specific situation.

Celebrating individuality: Ultimately, the beauty of living with someone lies in celebrating each other's individuality. Embrace the opportunity to learn from one another, grow together, and create a home environment that reflects the unique blend of your personalities and perspectives.

(The writer is a mental health and behavioural sciences columnist, conducts art therapy workshops and provides personality development sessions for young adults. She can be found @the_millennial_pilgrim on Instagram and Twitter)

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