In these changing times, words and phrases do not mean things they did some years back. Mind you, even in finance and money matters .be it in the share bazaar or in conversations between Grandpa and Grandma. Let us investigate along with V GANGADHAR
GrandPa: Give me the newspaper, I want to look at the market rates.
Grandma: Why do you need the paper? I have just returned from the market. Rates are almost the same as yesterday, ‘Batata’ 40 rupiya kilo, ‘Kandha’ 45 rupya a kilo,’ reengan’ Rs60 a kilo Rates are not coming down, slowly slowly we all will starve to death
Grandpa: This is known to all of us. Whenever you walk, look at the sky ,then you will know more about the market. As they say prices have touched the sky or from inside the house, you can see them hitting the roof. So look at the sky or roof when you walk so that you will not get hurt. O, by the way daughter Savitaben from New Jersey wants us to visit her in the US next month. I am supposed to perform ‘Satyararayan katha’, she will send us the money we need. .Have a look at the paper and tell me, how much we need, in dollars. O, that reminds me, what is the Conversion rate today . We had to tell her how much money we need, convert the figure into dollars and let her know the figure
Grandma: Conversion, conversion, it used to be in the inside pages .Have they changed it, I can’t find them in the usual pages Let me try the other pages (flips hem) Here, there is something on conversion on page 1 . Conversion to peak on December 25 (Christmas), January 1 and this date, that is some Muslim festival. This is something new, what is the link between currency conversion and religious festivals?
Grandpa: What rubbish! (Grabs the paper from her hands and flips through the pages carefully) Ae kya hain? This is not our usual ‘Gujarat Samachar’ or ‘Economic Times’? Where did this come from, this is ‘Dharmik Jagran Samachar’ (thinks over it a bit) I get it, this is an RRS newsletter and you know the RSS and VHP are in a conversion mood. They are planning to hold ‘conversion’ rallies all over the country, particularly during Christmas and Muslim festivals. With Christmas so near, it is their first target
Grandma: But what are these figures in the paper? Starting from 500 to some 2.5 lakhs or something like that
Grandpa: Must be some target figures everyday so many Christians to be converted, higher figures on festival days, this bumper figure of 2. 5 lakhs must be figure on Christmas day. I wonder if the Hindu fanatics be able to reach these steep targets and keep up their credibility
Grandma: who bothers about credibility on such issues? Hand over these figures to some TV channels and they will shout from the housetops? Best thing, hand them over to Arnab Goswami, you know the strength of his vocal chords. Within no time the nation will become aware of the target Conversion figures. what is true and what is false (ends)
(V Gangadhar writes satire, a special form of humour. Incidents and anecdotes in his column are
purely imaginary)
