Do you like if your boyfriend or girlfriend constantly is on phone with you? Or are you the one who is tired of all this and getting no 'ME TIME'?
THEN, you are in an urgency culture in relationships which leaves no space for one, to just be with oneself in peace. Staying connected is equally necessary and beautiful in any relationship but every thing in limit is okay. The idea that we should be in constant communication can be toxic in relationships. It creates the sense of fight or flight and is one of the leading causes of anxiety.
Urgency culture in a relationship looks like:
There would always be urgency or the situation that will put you into pressure to respond to another person immediately which isn't good.
The feeling to stay available all the time- 24/7.
The guilt of not being able to communicate with the other person immediately at that time.
Expecting your girlfriend/ boyfriend to immediately call or text you as soon as they see your missed call or messages.
Ways to remove urgency culture from your relationships:
Set clear boundaries. You should accept and respect each others' boundaries.
Not waiting constantly for the other person to get back to your missed call instead, you should keep ourselves busy with other things.
When you are not feeling well or not in a mood for a conversation with the significant other; express your concern to them. Take your time- let your brain relax till you are in a better place to respond to them.
If your anxious after reading the another person's messages; choose to keep your phone on side and go for a walk or journal about your feelings. This will give you a clarity and help you respond in a better way.
There is a stereotype in relationships that you should constantly communicate with your partner; which isn't true. Each relationship is unique and every person different; so don't let your relationship be guided by societal patterns.
Give space which will be good for your mental health and theirs; and your relationship will definitely flourish!!
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