Revolver Ranee Column: Howdy gaiyz

Howdy gaiyz, whatcha doin’? Did ya see the protesters outside the stadium in Houston? Tough, considering the 50,000-strong crowd was goin’ berserk inside. They stood with placards speaking against the communication blockage in Kashmir and other such mundane issues of our third world country. Haww, imagine "Ab ki baar Trump sarkar" being Trumpeted! Blondie needed to be introduced to our diyar NRIs. Well, well, that happens coz no rocket science needed to know majority are Democrats. Interesting bit is, many NRIs (and I can talk first hand of many, many friends) who hate Trump but simply adore NaMo.

This bit I never understood, they seem to take some sadistic pleasure in us Indians being deprived stealthily of a lot of rights, while they slam living back home. Anyway, I have never understood NRIs, because they are more interested in Kashmir than you and me. Suddenly, this new warmth was just new level of bromance. Both walking hand-in-hand around the field, waving at the people in the galleries.

Saw that kid with braces who got selfie with the ‘powerful leaders’, so keepsake one. Hope he doesn’t grow up to hide it in shame. Never know, times are changing.

What’s with the new fad of calling anyone and everyone father of India? Stitching us together? Oh gawd! I do not want conjoined twins, at least let me choose. Would opt for some nayansukhs, top of this list is Butterboy. This whole world touring is nice for the PM, na. He could not be bothered what his sidekicks in the party do, or what his right hand does.

The Motabhai toh has gone on a rampage, digging arather big grave. Can’t blame them, considering the real legal brain no more exists. So they go ahead and make tall proclamations of ED sending notice to the Maratha Pawarful leader. What to say to these fellas, anyone’s name figures on the list. Glad that some fun has been injected into an otherwise seemingly boring and predictable election. Now Marathas are angry, very angry.

How come the Tiger cubs and cousin clan is quiet? The old man would have roared loudly, not the least concerned with the alliance. Here their bread and butter seems to be glued to the alliance, can’t blame them. No interesting muktafals even in the Saamna as yet, never know, there can be sudden change of heart, but one needs a lot of spine for that.

Sharad Pawar
Sharad Pawar

And what's with idiots trying to target the young teen who took the world by storm! Hand it to her, she passionately believes in wanting to live in a clean, healthy environment. That's NOT asking for lot.

But Indian pushy parents seem to be missing the woods for the trees. That photo circulating, hello ladeez and gentus, that shows reusable plastic, travelling in a train to cut carbon footprint and lot of other sensible decisions, which YOUR kids should be following. But for those who keep their kids in air-conditioned environments, this is too alien to be understood.

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