Last in the Tin Bath – The Autobiography
David ‘Bumble’ Lloyd
Simon & Schuster UK Limited 2016
Rs 499, pp 303
First things first. The autobiography has been written by David Lloyd the dour opening batsman who represented Accrington Cricket Club and Lancashire, struggling to get the ball off the square. The humorous commentator with his quirky turn of phrase makes only fleeting appearances throughout this book.
It is an important point regarding the characteristic of this book because many people who pick this book up in a bookstore would do so because the face on the cover seems familiar as the eccentric and funny TV commentator who they have seen and heard while viewing matches played in England, or the odd IPL match a few years ago. They would be mildly to wildly surprised to know that David ‘Bumble’ Lloyd, the subject of this “autobiography” has been associated with the game for more than 50 years – as player, umpire, coach and now commentator.
The title of the book refers to Lloyd’s modest upbringing and provides an insight into his early life when the cost of heating meant that his extended family comprising of a few uncles and cousins could afford to take a hot bath only every Friday, and his lowly existence in the family hierarchy meant that he was often the last to get his turn into the bath when the water would be mostly lukewarm at best and definitely a lot murky.
As an England cricketer and a coach of the national team he had two short and seemingly not very satisfactory stints, and it is reflected in the space that the two important periods of his life get in the book. Much of his story dwells on his early life at Accrington, his abiding love for the place and the various sporting pursuits to be found there, especially his first love, which is football and the Accrington Stanley Club. Yet, he has also devoted a lot of his time as well as space in this book talking about his efforts to keep the Cricket Club going by raising funds for it from time to time.
David Lloyd played just nine tests for England, making his debut against India, scoring a double century, being selected to go to Australia for the Ashes where he faced Dennis Lillee and Jeff Thomson, got himself injured, and then never played for the national team again. To his credit, there is no finger pointing or name calling. David Lloyd very candidly admits that he probably had done as much as he could and there was nothing much that he could do to prolong his Test career, especially given the fact that he was competing for a spot in the side against Geoffrey Boycott.
Similarly, he does not dwell too much on his short-lived career as England coach, and one would have liked to have some more light thrown on the issues that plagued the England side then and how he went about addressing them, and the extent to which he succeeded. He does talk about the support that was not forthcoming from the England Board, to help him truly succeed, but there is not much in the way of details from the tours that he went on to as coach. There is some criticism that comes Zimbabwe’s way for the lack of hotel and practice facilities when England toured the country.
His insight as coach largely focus on the Kevin Pietersen controversy and how the matter could and should have been handled differently by all those concerned, and would have led to a different outcome that would have benefited England through the services of a senior talent like KP, and also given KP the opportunity to continue to shine on the world stage, that he so obviously loves doing.
Apart from his Accrington days, a large chunk of the book is reserved for his commentary stint which is natural enough since that is probably the longest career apart from his club and first-class playing career. He started his Sky Sports commentary stint a few days after losing his job as England coach in 1999, and it is a job in which he continues to entertain and enthral listeners. It is also probably the most enjoyable part of the book, littered with many anecdotes about his colleagues in the box, his own experiences, his idols, and many inside stories that will have the readers chuckling.
The sad part though is that one expects Bumble’s book to have more such portions throughout, and it is sad that such is not the case. Incidentally, the story about how he got his nickname is equally interesting. It is a hugely enjoyable journey for a boy who was the last to get into the tin bath in a modest household, who had a middling career as a player and coach, and who has got lots of fame and fan following as an insightful commentator with his northern English accent and sense of humour. It just does not come through adequately in the book.
True that it is an autobiography and not a joke book to have the readers in splits throughout, but the book certainly could have got off the square a few more time than it did instead of going through his life with a dead bat. Like his Test career, the book has one big score and a couple of times when he just misses fifty. It was his book to write, his story to tell, and it need not have been.
