Feeling demotivated
Hello. At 29 I switched fields, because I realised a job in the management sector was not for me. I was doing well, climbing the ladder steadily, but it just wasn’t me. At 33, I have chosen a career in photography for myself, but it’s going to take me a while to get established. While finances are not an issue (I have sufficient savings, plus my wife is working), it is really demotivating when I go out with my friends and hear about promotions and the exciting work they are doing – makes me feel like I made the wrong decision. What should I do? I feel like I’m being silly.
Ans: You have finally achieved your passion, and following a career path of your interest will help you to work hard as well as you’ll be able to pursue it willing for your entire life. Bygones are bygones, now that you have chosen the path you can follow your heart and give your fullest and try to cover up for the lost time. You need to be confident of your choice, initially it may take a while but once you start your work properly you too can take a leap and achieve higher goals. Be patient and allow yourself to grow instead of be critical of your slow pace, and just concentrate on your growth that in fact will help you to quicken up the pace if possible.
Taken for granted
I have what one might consider the perfect job – we can enter and leave office when we please, or work from home if that’s convenient. There are no set lunch hours, even the dress code is quite relaxed. Moreover, the seniors and subordinates – all of us are rather pally with each other, there is no hierarchy as such. However, this has been bothering me. Since there is no set job profile, I’m constantly asked for favours, required to stay in late for projects. I have no idea how to say no, or if I am even allowed to refuse. I feel like I’m being taken for granted. What should I do? Don’t get me wrong – I love my job – the work is excellent, the clients and exposure is wonderful. It’s just this matter of boundaries and definitions that is getting to me.
Ans: This seems to be more personal shortcoming then work issue, as you are not able to be assertive and take you stand. This usually happens to people who have been brought up in a strict authoritative environment may be home or school and you are asked to follow rule without thinking for yourself, and if this has been the case with you, you have never been required to take your own decision as to what is an appropriate behaviour. Well, this is your chance to learn so what you are comfortable with you can agree to and other things you can say no to politely giving a logical reason. Another reason could also be that probably you are analysing the situation too much and wondering what your work colleagues will say if you say a no or do not go out of your way to work, and if this is the problem then you should just focus on who you want to be if you want to work there for long as no one can mask for long, one day it will get on to you where you will be feel every overwhelmed and things will be out of hand. Rather be yourself from the binging people will accept you some will take time, but eventually they will be okay with your style of working.
Angry outbursts
I am a lead manager at my company, and am doing quite well for my age. I have received prestigious awards and accolades, and have also been given early promotions. While I have no complaints about my bosses or the work environment, I have been having trouble with myself lately. I feel unable to let go of details – tiny grammatical errors, filing mistakes, organizational inadequacies by my subordinates have been getting to me. I’ve been flying into a rage and yelling at my workers for tiny mistakes, and I can feel them avoiding me. As a result, I have received poor annual evaluation scores from my employees, and am worried that this might get in the way of my steady climb.
Ans: Your emotional quotient is affecting your interpersonal life at work. To simplify you need to seek help in terms of managing your emotions better as they have started reflecting in the way you deal with people. This will not only hamper your relationships at work but also start hampering your relationships in all fronts. You can talk to counsellors or if your company has any industrial psychologist appointed. Take a break, probably you are too worked up and you need to think beyond work. May be this break helps you to get back with a fresh approach to deal with the colleagues, or you can even speak to your colleagues about your problem and have a heart to heart conversation with them and they can help you through this.
