Agony Aunt

Daughters anxiety of earthquake

I have a 13 years old daughter. Since she saw a huge destructive earthquake happening on a new channel, she has started having sleepless nights. Somehow it has got stuck in her

head that an earthquake will strike the city anytime now and if she sleeps then she will be unable to run out of the building.

We have tried to reason with her many times but to no avail. Her sleeping pattern is affecting her studies and daily behaviour. What is a way to get this thought out of her head? Unfortunately, kids are really prone to constant worrying post a natural calamity even if they have not experienced it. Your daughter is going through stress regarding what she saw and she is tensed about if they same thing has to happen to her then what will happen? It is good that you have tried to talk to her however her fear is something that will not necessarily disappear by parents telling her that she is thinking wrong. For now, be supportive of her and donalt39t make her feel that she is thinking something abnormal if she talks about the earthquake again. Make her feel secure that parents will be always there for her, she should not worry too much. Try and distract her as well, take her out to movies or shopping. Encourage her going out with friends or involve her in housework etc. In order to examine her fears better, take her to a psychologist who would be of great help.

Worried about old mother

My mom is about 80 now and since our building renovation has been on, I have noticed her health fading. She cries about the fact that everything is changing and she is lonely in this new big house. She is complaining of not sleeping and feeling weak. Physically, she is active and goes to her temple and does yoga regularly. Yet she started to get scared of the building construction work. The only thing she keeps talking about is when this work is going to finish and its affecting her health a lot. But this is really meagre thing, what do I tell her?

Often, individuals in their mature age of life dislike any changes in their surroundings and its a common issue with most people of that age group. It looks like your mom is uncomfortable with the changes that are happening in her home environment. Its a good thing that she is still active and goes out. During such a time, the family members should understand her concern and not demean or ridicule her issues. She must be trying to avoid or be scared of building work because to her it possibly represents changes that are not welcomed by her. You can tell her that everyone in the house dislikes construction work, but it is necessary and nothing can be done about it.

One could encourage her to plan things in the future when the work is finished and how she can participate in it. Keep her busy with work that she can do out of the house like taking the kids out etc.

Dr. Anjali Chhabria MINDTEMPLE http:// anjalichhabria. com