Father's Day 2024: Why Dads Don't Get Labels Like Silky or Almond Moms

Father's Day 2024: Why Dads Don't Get Labels Like Silky or Almond Moms

Parenting is never an easy job. Each parent uniquely impacts the child's life

Sapna SarfareUpdated: Sunday, June 16, 2024, 10:56 AM IST
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Parenting is never an easy job. Each parent uniquely impacts the child's life. However, mothers get a little extra attention when it comes to tagging and marketing. New types of moms have recently come out, from Almond Mom to Silky Mom. 

Why is there no tag?

Ashish Aggarwal, Managing Director, Acube Ventures, is the father of two teenage sons. He mentions, “Historically, taking care of the child has been the mother’s domain. However, today, a father’s role in a child's development is becoming important. As fathers look forward to spending more quality time with their children, we might see more terms defining them in the future.” He disagrees with the idea that the fathers lack recognition since they are many times called "My Superhero, My Papa”.

Actor Gireesh Sachdev, seen as Dhanraj in the show Vanshaj on Sony TV, is the father of a 22-year-old daughter and 17-year-old son. He reveals, “I believe a child is initially more connected to the mother, having spent months in her womb. The father, often seen as a strong figure, is sometimes overlooked in terms of emotional connection and recognition.”

Fashion Designer Shilpi Gupta is a mother of three kids. She does feel fathers get destined with conventional gender norms where they become providers or discipliners. “Mothers are tagged as the nurturing souls and caregivers for their children. These traditional views hinder the identification of the role of fathers more than they are addressed.”

Gupta feels that marketing strategies for parenting target mothers more and the varied tags that they have received over he years is an outcome of that.

Credit talks

Renowned Bharatanatyam artist Apeksha Niranjan, a mother to a 17-year-old-son, feels fatherhood isn't always as recognised in a child's life as motherhood. "This is reflected in media portrayals and even legal biases favouring mothers in custody battles. Additionally, workplace policies often prioritise mothers’ needs over fathers’. However, both parents play crucial roles in a child’s upbringing, and acknowledging the significance of fatherhood is essential for fostering healthy family dynamics.”

Personally, Gireesh does not take credit for the things he does as a father because he does it out of selflessness. "However, fathers deserve equal respect to mothers, as both share significant responsibilities in raising a child. I’m playing the role of the father in my current show Vanshaj as well and I can do it a little easily because I understand the role of a father in real life.”

Gupta, however, feels there is a significant rise in recognising a father's role in their children's upbringing. "In contemporary times, fathers actively engage in the roles of caregivers and emotional supporters. The sense of security and problem-solving techniques that a father provides help the child build confidence and self-esteem.”

Ashish reveals, “The scenario is changing nowadays, as both parents are working professionals in most families, leading to a mutual responsibility. As a result, the bond between father and child is becoming stronger than in the past.”

Personal experience

Gireesh narrates, “I was 26 when my daughter, my princess, was born. It took me nearly a decade to fully grasp my role as a father and understand the responsibility it entailed.”

Ashish does see fathers spending more time and being concerned about their child's daily activities. "They understand that their involvement has a great influence on their children and are, therefore, willing to instil positive qualities in them. You will see many more fathers attending school PTMs now and spending their weekends with their children. Nowadays, advertisements have become highly influential in shaping societal stereotypes, as they depict both parents sharing the same job roles and household chores, which sets an example for their children.”

The right tag

In the end, Apeksha wants men to embrace the ‘Modern Daddy’ tag on entering fatherhood. “The modern father is a blend of traditional masculinity and traits typically associated with mothers. He’s not just a provider but also a friend, guide, mediator, designated driver, shopping partner, cook, and caretaker.”

Ashish thinks that fathers must teach their children to respect themselves and society at any stage. He also feels that one parent must be a figure of authority the child fears. “This fear should last only until the child is about 11-12 years old. After that, both parents need to become friends with their child and communicate as smoothly as possible to better understand their child's changing adolescent behaviour.”

Gireesh gives a crucial suggestion — understand that each child comes with their individuality. “It’s important not to impose your expectations on them. Financial planning is also essential to ensure the child can have a good life. Additionally, it’s vital not to compare your parenting methods to how your father treated you.

Every child is different, and what worked for you may not work for them. Fathers should be actively involved in their child’s daily growth, education, and nurturing. When a second child is born, the dynamic changes again, and the same methods may not be effective. Each relationship is unique and requires a tailored approach.”

This said, it could be safe to say that in the coming few years one would be writing about a ‘helicopter dad’ and other dad tags. “It looks like an organic progression in offing. Dads will be tagged as they are more active,” concludes counsellor Dr. R.L. Barve.

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