Revolver Ranee: War and Peace

What interesting times we live in, in apna desh. Once we were told to READ Economist to learn to write obits. Now, the world must be laughing at us, obits in India are a whitewash, in the name of not speaking ill of the dead. Praises are showered, there is soft Hindutva, politicians’ legacy of divisiveness, tonsuring heads, supporting anti-socials, being instrumental in derailing economy, all are erased. Instead, there is gushing worship from mentees. Public admission of deliberate shift from journalism to stenography.

Now we cannot be reading about war in other countries also. Striking a blow in the land of Ahimsa, the High Court justice has questioned why we should be reading about war in other countries. Breathe global peace, what goes of ours. Me is planning to seek asylum, problem is which country?

Sceptics like me are asked to leave the country and are given examples of Saudi Arabia and other conservative Islamic countries, compared to our falling standards. Just to put on record, their star politician, yes, same 56-inch chest one, has been awarded highest award. Chalo, this too is quietly accepted.

He is globe-trotting while his cabinet is forced to take in desi hawa. So sad, and then also they are tracked. Hope no chip is inserted for tracking biometrics. Psst...PM knows the dollar rate? From where does he exchange money? Who does it for him? Aren’t our taxes calculated? Here, our hearts sink reading rupee losing ground as dollar climbs to 72. Any amount of rupees seems less.

And during MMS times, dollar was at 39! Such pride it was to hold that rupee. Bad days for taxpayers. Imagine, shame shame, puppy shame to say one has fixed deposits. Chhee, interest rates are making one say spend all the money on gold, which too has gone up to Rs 40,000 for 10 grams.

Revolver Ranee: War and Peace

Dunno what these politicians are up to. Full dhishum-dhishum at G-7, with Brazilians making fun of French first lady, which has got Macron’s goat, all this as Amazon fire rages. One would think these biggies would know which fire is a priority.

As usual, missing the wood for the trees. Trump and Modi must have some super-innovative ideas to douse those raging flames. One believes cloudburst helped hide a fighter plane, other strongly believes typhoons can be nuked. Let’ s hope Amazon is spared such experiments.

What bromance that was! Aww, two top leaders gushing, squeezing hands and all. Ouch. How sporting we are, when Trump giggled, ‘Modi speaks good English.’ Roaring laughter, with more jokes. Can’t blame Melania caught mid-buss with Justin. By god, all jallous feelings were felt.

Another cheer leader who bit the dust was chhora Chetan. Tweeted like enthu cutlet for Sumit Nagal during his match against Roger Federer.

Bhagat surely lives in a bubble, he has never heard of Ramesh Krishnan, Vijay Amritraj, Leander Paes. He wonly knows, no Indian before has done well in international tennis. ‘Slow applause’ and he should be made to walk down the ramp. Time the elitists of the Trump-Modi world give this Chetan membership to their story-spinning club. Birds of a feather, as they say.

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