Revolver Ranee: Of Ram, Badlapur and Udta Bollywood

Revolver Ranee: Of Ram, Badlapur and Udta Bollywood

Revolver RaneeUpdated: Saturday, August 03, 2019, 06:57 PM IST
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The whole political jhamela is driving my friends crazy. They don’t know which party their leaders have gone to. ‘We, the original, classy voters’ are not swayed by the current mood or the so-called wave. “What you mediawaalas are calling them aaya Ram, gaya Ram,” they question, rolling their eyes.

I wonder who they are voting for. ‘The face,’ is the prompt reply. I can’t tell you how much I like this, Butterboy will win hands down. I am all for making good looks one of the criteria to select politicians. Gawd, a majority will automatically be disqualified. Khee khee khee.

Speaking of parties and their leaders, one mucchhad toh has gone and told few media people how his ‘saaheb’ held on to a file for the tiger’s den in Bandra East and lots of other things. By the end of the day, messages were going viral, this mucchhad ‘Bunty’ leader was to join the Big Jhol Party. My sides are hurting only.

As if the political circus is not maddening enough, these trolls and right-wing religious sorts are tainting my favourite spice, saffron. The new saffronites, are rich, educated duds. Seriously man, such dhishum dhishum during Shravan is not good for health. Evidently, this forced abstinence is not teaching these blokes any thing. Besides, who orders food from outside during ritual abstinence? So this so-called pandit fella took to Twitter to unleash his gussa against the food being delivered by a Muslim.

And then began bhaigiri against the food app. By god, the food app suddenly gave a tight one and put the fella in his place reminding him, ‘Food is religion’. Yes, baba, I toh live, swear and breathe by food. Now what to say, we are alive to see asininegiri. 

Speaking of asses, the poor policemen in Pandharpur are left dealing with these mules. Poor fellas, the sand mafia send ace swimmers to dredge soil illegally from the riverbed. Minute the police get a tip-off and run to the spot, these fellas jump into the river and swim to their freedom. This time, the police held 40-odd asses and parked them at the police station. Now instead of going on patrolling, our cops are feeding fodder to donkeys! Some animal farm, this.

Badla, naturally brings my train of thought to Badlapur. Wonder how many more instances of trains being stuck due to waterlogging it will take to put the railways on guard. Their bosses are smoking something strong. They have the infrastructure and system in place.

All they have to do is push these points men in the rear, get them to do their jobs properly, to inform the headquarters, there are heavy rains and floods, DO NOT send the trains. But the railways is in deep slumber. Passengers suffered but railways couldn’t be bothered.

Smoking brings to mind Udta Bollywood. See the video doing rounds carefully, replay a couple of times. But how did this Akali Dal dude get to KJo party, is the goodh (mystery). The josh is high, with one wiping his sniffer, as seen in fillums.

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