Swami Brahmavidananda Saraswati
We hear a lot of talk of polarization in both, social media and mainstream media. One group is generally blamed for the polarization and the wars of words continue. It is true that when one group tries to change the status quo for reasons of their own there will always be a push back or reaction from those who have profited from the system and who are afraid of the change. Change is inevitable in every society.
At the same time, one need not feel threatened by the change. We feel threatened because we imagine the other as all evil, without any understanding about what the other group is about. This occurs on both sides. All that is required is for both groups to listen to each other and come to some sort of understanding.
But people are afraid to come to an understanding because they think that understanding is equal to agreeing with the other person. I never fail to stress this very important point in all my communication workshops. Understanding is not equal to agreement. It is only after I understand the other person can I choose to agree or disagree.
Therefore, understanding precedes agreement or disagreement. This is often overlooked by groups and they are not even willing to hear one another. If people truly understood this fundamental principle, there will be a better attempt at understanding each other and probably less polarization in any society.
However this will work only if both the groups are at least genuinely willing to understand each other and really care for the society. Both or one of them cannot use this listening as a tool to exploit the other group. Suppose one group has understood the other group and uses the understanding against them, then it will not work. The other group will not reveal themselves. This principle works only if both groups are willing to see what is good for society and each other or have win-win thinking, in short. In both, personal relationships and in public discourse, we need to understand that ‘Understanding is not equal to agreement’.
