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Sex and Relationships

Updated on: Sunday, October 24, 2021, 06:50 AM IST

Candid Corner: The lousy kisser

Pic: Pexels

Pic: Pexels

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Q) My boyfriend doesn’t know how to kiss. The experience is so unpleasant that I have started avoiding kissing completely. I am his second girlfriend, so I guess he has no experience? I would love to teach him but don’t know how. What do you suggest?

Ans: Tell him to kiss you the way he wants to be kissed by you. This will bring awareness to what feels right to his lips and help him learn from his own pleasurable experience. And like most things in life, giving positive feedback is imperative for kissing too. Validate the experience by telling him how much you enjoy kissing him first and then suggest in detail how this can be made even better by adding what you enjoy.

You can also communicate that you are open to trying something new together. Make him think and come up with new ways of kissing that you guys have not tried before. Remind him that there are many elements involved in the act: breath, tongue, lips, teeth, saliva and even fingers, food, or all sorts of objects that can be used to stimulate your mouth.

A kiss is an intense play of the senses. Explain to him that lips have many nerve endings and that these cause a chemical reaction in your brain, releasing the so-called ‘love hormone’ oxytocin. Kissing a lot and kissing well will make your relationship stronger and sexier. It will turn both of you on, which will translate into more physical intimacy. I am sure that’s a great incentive to motivate him.

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Last but not least, show him how you would like him to do it. Just tell him to stay still and show him. After each touch and movement of lips and tongue, explain how you like to receive the sensation. Eye gazing and breathing together will set the mood and enhance your experience. Taking it slow will build erotic tension and make you both steaming hot.

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Published on: Sunday, October 24, 2021, 07:00 AM IST
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