I am a mother of two: A 2-year-old toddler and a newborn. I delivered in January before everything blew up. It is just my husband, in-laws and I in the house and taking care of two young children and doing all the housework is really exhausting. I don’t have any help and I feel frustrated which I indirectly take out on my children. The younger one constantly needs me and I feel very irritated by having to be a mother 24/7. I feel like I have no other life.
It must be really difficult to be nurturing a newborn along with handling household responsibilities. I would like to highlight few things for your well-being so that you don’t end up feeling so negative about just being a mother. It is important that you connect with a therapist to rule out the possibility of post-partum depression. This could simply be you overworking in the last few months. I would suggest delegating the household responsibilities amongst everyone depending on who can take up what and focusing only on those things that require you specifically. Connect with your friends over a call even if it is simply to rant, good friends can be a good support system in times like these.
I used to be an alcoholic and was in a rehabilitation centre three years ago. I recovered, but now loneliness and anxiety has tempted me to pick up the bottle again. When my wife goes out, I drink secretly. Recently, she caught me and we fought. I drank even more after that and now I can’t stop. How can I help myself and my wife in this lockdown?
Ans: A relapse in alcoholism is possible when things are extremely difficult to deal with and if one gives in to temptation. Lockdown has resulted in pushing people to the edge where many have taken extreme measures when unable to cope. You have realisation and wish to get out of this relapse, thus reaching out to your old therapist or de-addiction therapist and seeking help immediately is recommended as we can nip the problem in the bud. Therapist can also help your wife understand how relapse works and how she can help in certain ways so that recovery is faster. I understand that you must have put in immense efforts to get rid of alcoholism at the rehabilitation and this time around, too, by being proactive with some external help you will achieve positive results.
I am 28 years old. I’m short and slightly overweight. I used to work late hours and so would not interact with family much. They always viewed me negatively. Now in lockdown, I am facing their taunts and comments all the time and I also have PCOS which is stressing me out. They don’t believe my condition is real and think I’m faking it for attention. I’m anxious, depressed and want to get away from my family. What do I do?
PCOS could be a huge contributing factor to your mood imbalance. Since the relationship between you and your family seems quite strained, home environment could be difficult to handle. Here, instead of focusing on convincing them that problem exists, focus on how to get a better handle over PCOS and other related issues. Few lifestyle changes are essential to get a hold on your PCOS. Starting with some exercise can help you become physically, as well emotionally, better. Once you are emotionally in a better place, you can hold a better conversation with your family members wherein you can understand where their negative view about you stems from and how you can bridge the gap in communication.