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Agony Aunt

Updated on: Saturday, June 15, 2019, 12:18 PM IST

Agony Aunt: A colleague at my workplace is constantly interfering with my work

At my workplace, there is a colleague who is interfering with my work. She passes an opinion on every task I do or any assignment I take up.
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Nagging co-worker

At my workplace, there is a colleague who is interfering with my work. She passes an opinion on every task I do or any assignment I take up. Even if she is wrong and I am right, she enforces her suggestions on me. I have been here for the last six months and this behaviour of hers initially was perceived as warm and helpful by me. However, now that I am excelling at my work and getting more recognition, I feel that her constant inputs are quite frustrating and at times outright demeaning. How do I get her to change this habit of hers without hurting her?

I understand that constant interference from someone without there being an apparent need could lead to a lot of frustration. There could be underlying insecurity that your colleague could be displaying here as you mentioned that her inputs are quite demeaning. Your efforts here if centred around conveying your discomfort can work better than focusing on whether or not you hurt her. Also understanding that your relationship with her might undergo some major changes once you confront her is essential so that you convey things exactly how they bother you.

When achievements affects others

I have been working in this company for the past four months. Being a complete fresher, I felt lucky to be accepted so warmly and was surprised to be able to pick up things so fast at my workplace. This doesn’t seem to have gone down well with a colleague who joined the company a couple of months before me and seems to be lagging behind. It is apparent from her behaviour that she feels unhappy at any of my achievements and keeps comparing both of our work. I feel uneasy because of this and don’t know what to do.

It is essential to keep in mind that you and your colleague are two different individuals and that the kind of work you two do will be different as a result of the individual differences. At the moment you are probably thinking from both sides and as a result it might be bothering you. Sometimes, it is essential to go ahead and have a conversation with the person if it is making you feel uneasy, thus, talking to her and having a face to face conversation about the situation can make things better. As a conclusion, even if she still shares the same sentiment as earlier you can still hold your ground and not allow it to affect you emotionally.

Not a ‘know-it-all’

After a lot of insistence by my family, I joined my father in his business almost eight months ago. I took a few months to understand the know-how’s of the company and later started giving suggestions to my team and my father on improvements and modifications based on my education. Owing to this I have garnered the reputation of ‘know-it-all’ and usually hear people making fun of me. This bothers me as my father also can’t intervene beyond a point. What can I do?

It might often happen that senior employees in an organisation are difficult to work with as there is a widely held belief that seniority is accompanied by number of years. You being perceived as know it all is probably a result of them seeing you as a threat as you seem to be updated with the recent developments. An ice breaking session if your focus is on the fact that there are certain things which requires seniority and certain other things that demand expertise you will be able to join hands with them as working in tandem for any organisation is important.

Golden opportunity & the guilt

I have been working in this organisation since the past four years and I'm extremely comfortable with the kind of work as well as colleagues and environment at the workplace. Last week I was contacted by a rival company for a job offer which included more pay, promotion and work-life balance. In the past four years at my current workplace I have worked for about 12-14 hours a day which has often affected my health and I don’t see that changing anytime soon. Hence, I am very eager and tempted to take up this new job. But my guilt is not helping me make this an easy decision.

Exploring and understanding the source of the guilt is important as it is a hindering factor for your career. The offer is quite lucrative as it suffices your requirements for better job conditions. You mentioned your current job conditions aren’t changing anytime soon thus making it even more imperative to consider this new job opportunity. It is important to understand that the number of years invested in a given company do not always necessarily equate to making you happy. the comfort developed with the colleagues is understandable however, that factor alone can’t replace the fact that a job requires you to be mentally and emotionally relaxed. This said guilt could be a result of making a shift from the given comfort zone. Once you are able to move past the notion of what you are leaving behind, the guilt might also dissipate.

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Published on: Sunday, June 16, 2019, 06:45 AM IST
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