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Agony Aunt helps you to deal with workplace problems

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Frustration affecting work  

I am a 28-year-old IT engineer working in a multinational company since last 5 years. I am married and have a child. Since last one year, I am feeling very unmotivated to go to work and I do not find it interesting or challenging anymore. At times, I am so frustrated that I just want to switch my profession. Although, losing out on a secure job is not a wise thing to do as it disrupts my family’s lifestyle. Kindly suggest the probable solutions to this problem as I have spoken to nearly every friend and relative and they all have mixed opinions. 

Ans: Stepping out of a comfort zone is usually very unsettling and thus creates a conflict. You are probably struggling as the prospect of trying something new will have effects on your family too. Striking a balance between your work and personal life is essential. Thus, make a choice based on long-term benefits. If you are sure as to what you wish to jump into after the secure job then the journey wouldn’t be as difficult as it seems.


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Workplace isolation

I am a 30-year-old woman and I have recently started working as an assistant professor in a private university. It’s been a month and I am unable to get along well with the colleagues here. Yesterday, I overheard a conversation in which they were making fun of me as well. I feel left out and irritated and that is also hampering my efficacy at work. I have never been very good with new people but would like to change this and I feel this work environment isn’t helping me so far. Am I expecting too much? What should I do about it?

Ans: Being in a new environment would require work from both ends to get along. If you are finding the work environment hostile towards you, speaking to one of the colleagues who is approachable might be starting for ice breaking. There isn’t any pressure to build a friendly relationship at work but at least one that helps you feel relaxed is essential. If the initiative for ensuring a good work environment falls unto you then as an effort towards self-wellbeing is a must. Also, many a time our own anxieties might create a perception which doesn’t allow us to look outside and assume more than needed.

The game of attraction

I am a 24-year-old lawyer and I work at a corporate law firm in Pune. My boss is a 45-year-old married man with two children. He is very overbearing and yells at me all the time. However, I am very attracted to him and all the yelling seems only to augment this attraction. I don’t know what to do anymore and now it’s affecting my personal and professional life. Please guide me.

Ans:  You mentioned that his yelling seems to augment the liking, this would require some assistance from a professional who could help you understand more about yourself and attachment patterns. You may then be in a position to take a call regarding your feelings towards your boss. It is important to understand that there are many factors to consider here along with your feelings. Thus, a professional could assist you tackle those kinds of feeling.

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Battle of generation

I am a 58-year-old woman and work at an IB school as a literature professor. Recently the school has engaged in a hiring spree and all the new teachers that they have taken on board are very young and energetic. I feel like a fish out of water and I’m very nervous to approach them. It is now even affecting my lectures and I feel anxious in front of the students. Last week I heard few students saying that the new professors are really good and they like them more than the older ones. This affected me as well. Please tell me what to do.

Ans: Often experience would be seen as a good initiator for conversations. You could probably team up with other older professors and hold a small informal meet with the younger lot and try to mingle with them which could break the ice. In exchange, you could also learn few things which could help you with the students from a younger perspective. Being anxious about the newer lot and them probably taking over the environment might be a factor that needs to be addressed as the stress is getting to you professionally.