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Agony Aunt helps you to deal with workplace problems

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Falling for senior

I am a 21-year-old girl, and I am currently interning at a big law firm. I am in love with the Senior partner of the firm, he’s married and has two kids. I have been interning here for the past 6 months, and he has frequently made passes and advances at me, but I have managed to stir clear of them, but recently it has become hard for me to resist him, and ignore his advances. I don’t want this situation to get messy but I am finding it harder and harder to stop these feelings. Please help me.

Ans: The distinction needs to be made regarding your feelings towards him: love/infatuation/lust. In case of any confusion or doubts regarding your feelings towards him might jeopardise things for you. Once the clarity sets in, talking to the person might help you know what are his intentions and whether or not both of you are on same page. The feelings have to be given a proper channel to express as trying to stop them might be detrimental to your own mental wellbeing.


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Longing for promotion

I am a 36-year-old woman. I have been working at the same firm for the past 7 years, and for a long time I have really enjoyed working here and given it my all. In the past year, I have worked very hard and was guaranteed a promotion by my then boss. However, my boss had to leave the company because the son of the company’s owner was going to take over his position. My new boss is extremely young and inexperienced, and has not acted on my promotion yet, whenever I bring it up; he shrugs it off and tells me that he hasn’t seen me do any work that deserves a promotion. I am extremely frustrated as I have worked way too hard to get where I am, and I don’t know what to do. Please help.

Ans: You can request for a job review and bring into your boss’s notice about the quality of work done by you so far. Despite your efforts if you do not receive enough appreciation then looking out for better job offers could be an option. Your hard work need not be put on hold just because the current boss is not extending that validation. If you believe in your hard work and capabilities you can apply it at another workplace and get your due. Thus, trust in your capabilities and do not hesitate to venture out if the current place doesn’t give you what you deserve.

Disrespectful Employees

I am a 42-year-old man. I am the senior director at an ad agency. For over five years now my employees have been disrespecting me and disobeying my orders with an exponentially increasing intensity. I feel very insulted and helpless because they don’t take me seriously. When I talk to my superiors about this issue, they don’t seem to care either. I don’t know how to deal with this on a personal and professional level. I also don’t know what type of a leadership style would be productive in such a situation. Please guide me.

Ans: In order to know which type of leadership style works for you it is essential to first assess your leadership style and the flaws in it. There are leadership programs/workshops that place which helps in enhancing your skills as a leader, you can opt for such programs. Another way to create an impact could be having a frank discussion with the subordinates and hear them out. this enables a communication channel amongst you all and you might realise where you can improve based on their inputs.

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When husband becomes boss

I am a 30-year-old woman and work at my husband’s office. He is my direct supervisor. For a while now, he has been extremely unprofessional at the workplace and gives me duties that are not work related. He keeps bringing home problems to work and he yells at me about personal issues in front of our colleagues. I don’t want to create drama at work and neither do I want to leave my job or jeopardise my marriage. Can you please tell me how I can tactfully deal with this situation?

Ans: Taking some time off from work and having a thorough conversation with your husband at the earliest might help the situation. You can then state your issues with his approach in private and both of you can work out the problems without necessarily ending in a fight. Also find out the reason for his behaviour towards you in case of any job stress that is being displaced on to you and you can be of any help in order to help him. While conversing with him also emphasise the importance of keeping work at office and coming home with a relaxed mind rather than being worked up and ruining the home environment as well.