Free Press Journal

Agony Aunt helps you to deal with workplace problems


Looking for better opportunity

I am a young man living in a retired city. It is very picturesque and I have lived here my whole life but I don’t want to continue living here in my prime years. This place is very boring and has very few job opportunities. I know almost everyone here and a lot of times this can feel very monotonous. I wish I could go out and leave this town but there are financial constraints which prevent me from leaving this place. I do have a Masters’ degree and computer engineering and would like to explore my potential in the big city. I don’t want to end up being bitter about it and take up any job. Please help me as I don’t know what to do.

Ans: Since you are very young and still have a long way to go, you have all the resources to experiment, and explore your potential to the fullest and for that you will have to get out of your comfort zone, even if that means changing places. You have very good qualifications and if you stay determined enough you will get golden opportunities in a big a city. With regards to the finances, probably initially you can try for a job that gives you good perks as that will cover up a lot of your daily expense, since you have high degree you can try for such benefits. Another way is an obvious one, it is to ask your extend folks to help you out temporarily, as once you start earning in at a good company you will be able to repay the loan. There will be hurdles but they should be minor considering you have a good educational background and such obstacles are expected anywhere, so that should hold you back from achieving your dreams.

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Workplace bullying

I am currently working in a hospital and I am the youngest in my department. Despite being the youngest, I am very good at my work and due to that my peers are very jealous of me. Even my seniors have a tendency to bully me. They would not give me any difficult cases to handle and would burden me with many simpler cases, just so that I look inefficient in front on my seniors. Since I am from a different state, it is difficult for me to understand and talk in Marathi, they use this against me by purposeful giving me task like dealing with peons or general staff which has affected me in terms of getting work done and my performance looks bad. Please help me with my situation as I don’t know what to do.

Ans: This is work bullying, and you need to express this to someone in authority to get a way out or else there is no end to this ridiculous behaviour. A little bit of healthy competition is good and motivating but if it turns into an ugly inhuman emotional treatment, you should take control over the situation, and report to someone. You can either fight or flight, meaning you can either fight it out by taking a bold step and going against them or you can accept the situation the way it is but give your best in all given circumstances, for instance if they give to simpler cases you do them and stay content with them, or if the ask you to deal with Marathi speaking staff you learn the basic to convey your message in a gist. Both ways you’ll have risk attached of not being able to gain what you are aiming for but you’ll overcome the difficulties.

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Overcoming mistakes
I recently took my first job as an HR in a highly reputed firm. There has been some anxiety and pressure to keep up to the expectation that my senior has. I have been doing well but I get worried about my performance sometimes and tend to make mistakes as this is my first job. I am feeling scared to take up any work because I feel I will not be able to do the work properly and end up getting scolded from my senior. This is not only affecting my behaviour at work, but I also end up thinking about it at home and this has been haunting my personal life. I want to move on with the mistakes that I have done and not worry about my future performance but somehow I feel I am stuck as to how I should change my behaviour at work, deal with the mistakes that I make and get over it. Please help

Ans: Exaggerated worry thoughts is what you are experiencing, and it is resulting into stressful feeling, however this is in your hands to break the vicious cycle of negative thoughts leading to extreme feelings and that begins a whole new bad thinking phase. What you need to do is begin by changing your thought processes, and makes them more rational, for instance is it fair for yourself that you expect yourself not to ever make any mistake. If you don’t give yourself a fair chance, what would you expect from others? You rather think more sensible thought like I try my best in any given situation and I learn from my past mistakes. You are trapping yourself into a mess, and only you can bring the necessary change, break free and start fresh and give yourself a second chance everyone deserves it.